Wednesday, September 17, 2008

I'm back, and with a vengance!

Yesterday I was ready to give up. The attacks from satan had me on my knees. Unfortunately for him, that's the best place any true believer can be. I have thrown myself at my Lord's feet and begged for wisdom. I begged for faith. He always delivers! I am sick and tired of some stupid demon attacking my life. My Lord is bigger than that. I am bigger than that. "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me" I can do this.

Now, having said that, please don't think that I'm super strong, or very wise. I'm not. It may be a sin, but I envy those that can wake up with a smile and be ready to attack the day. I'm not one of those. I battle depression and anxiety attacks on a daily basis. And, yes, I take medication for that. Without a lot of prayer and study of my Bible, I could easily become house-bound afraid of the world. Praise Jesus He sets me free (as much as I allow Him.)

My thoughts today are on controlling fear and anger. I've heard some say that depression is just anger turned inward. I guess in my case that's true. I've been angry that the enemy keeps attacking, then I get angry that I've allowed that to control me, etc. It's a very vicious cycle. What do you do if you find yourself feeling blue? I have found that listening to praise music and reading my Bible, specifically Psalms or Proverbs, my mood will lift considerably. I also journal my thoughts, ideas and fears. My journal contains my conversations with Jesus. I hold no punches in my journal. He knows what I'm thinking, so I share it. It also helps me later on when I may have something similar happen.

1 comment:

A Day in the Life of Craziness said...

Don't tell God how big your storm is, tell the storm how big your God is.

Love to you.